There Are Times

There are times when he looks at me,

Really looks at me, into me,

With his eyes he deciphers,

The colors of my soul,

With his heart he knows there's more.

There are times when he touches me,

Reads my body like brail,

Each and every goose-bump,

Telling a brand new tale.

There are times when he breathes me in,

Every scent, every smell,

A medley of sweat, sex and soul,

A unique but potent spell.

There are times when he tastes me,

A taste he now knows well,

A palette that hungers, as my lips begin to swell,

He traces his tongue over every curve and bend,

A connoisseur swirling fine wine,

Considering this bodied blend.

There are times when he hears me,

Truly listens,

Not just to my words but to my thoughts,

My emotions, my every breath,

Even when I can not understand or explain,

He finds a way to decipher my mental hell.

There are times I mistake,

His knowledge, acceptance and

Inherent connection with "The Self",

As arrogance or over confidence,

Or lacking in realism,

But each and every time he centers me,

Brings me back to the Now,

I'm reminded of what it is to live and love well.

The Real Deal

Why run when,

You can,

Fly?

Why hide when,

You can,

Shine?

Why back down when,

You can,

Fight?

Why would you,

Choose flight,

Over fight?

Why think when,

You can,

Be?

Why numb it out when,

You can,

Feel?

Why complicate things when,

You can keep it,

Simple?

Why fake it,

When you can,

Smile with a dimple?

Something With You

Something special,

Something true,

Is that something possible with you?

Something open,

Something exposed,

Are your scars something more than closed?

Something comfortable,

Something new,

Is that something alright with you?

Something fearless,

Something bold,            

Could you jump into something with a blind fold?

Something intense,

Something unrelenting,

Is that something more than pretending?

Something reasonable,

Something compromised,

Could you forgo something without anything to hide?

Something honorable,

Something reliable,

Is that something you consider pliable?

Something old,

Something new,

Are these emotions confusing you?

Something sturdy,

Something real,

Is that something you could feel?

I Don't Know

I do not know what to do,.
Or how to do it,
But I'm devastated.

I do not know what to say,.
Or what to think,
But I'm vulnerable.

I do not know when,
Or if I'll ever be selfish,.
Self involved enough to forgo my fulfillment.

I do not know why,
But I can not stay,
Running is the safest way.

I do not know if I'll ever change,.
But today it seems impossible,
Wanting more than what your capable.

I do not know how it's possible,.
To feel so resistless,
To the thoughts of being inadequate.

I do not know where,
Your head is at,
I'm absolutely, utterly terrified of that.

Origin

It starts with a smile,

A simple gesture,

An eye contact of luster,

An imaginary fluster.

It begins with a look,

A piercing insight,

Eyes of lust,

The possibility of trust.

It’s introduced with gustier,

My heart’s never mustered,

The ability to be comforted,

The probability of being cuddled.

It gets going with a pleasured hint,

With light headed feet,

The journey indefinite,

The butterflies welcomed.

It’s undertaken as a joy,

Slowly evolving into more,

Butterflies replaced with overall excitement,

Levels of expectations and self entitlement.

Will I?

Will I ever overcome,

This pain that is so numb?

Will I ever conquer,

This ache that is so powerful?

Will I ever diminish,

This flame of complete malevolence?

Will I ever forget,

The love that left me heartless?

Will I ever move on,

Find some fool to replace you?

Will I ever not regret,

Your mistakes my ambivalence?

Will I ever know,

That the mistake was loving you so?

Will I ever heal,

This love is so painfully real?

Will I ever let go,

Of the best I’ve ever had?

Will I ever spend a day,

Without your barging into my mind in some way?

Will I ever stop and doubt,

That we could actually work this out?

Will I ever give up hope,

Wishing you would but you wont.