How do I live with the memories,
Fire-lit nights with chilled Tequila,
Your eyes devouring me from the moment I walk in.
How do I teach my skin to forget,
The way you honored me,
Rope on skin, skin on skin.
How do I learn to live without you,
Without your constant unwavering strength and security,
Without your eyes, your hands, your mouth.
How do I live without the intimacy,
The way you really listened to me,
The way you understood me.
How do I go back to being just me,
There is always this empty seat where you should be,
Walking into a room without you is unbearable.
How do I let you go,
How do I let us go,
How do I let our future go?
Meeting you felt like coming home,
I have never felt more safe and cherished,
I have never felt more complete.
They say that when you know, you know,
I knew, I knew it in my bones,
I knew you.
You gave me your trust,
You gave me your unwavering dedication,
You gave me parts of myself I didn't even know existed.
How do I live with these new parts of me,
There is no one who understands me,
No one who really knows me, you knew me.
How do I put on a brave face,
When Jette speaks your name,
How do I handle his heartbreak and mine?
How do I move forward,
Every dream I had included you,
Where to now, I feel lost without you.
How I am I supposed to be grateful,
When all I feel is loss,
When all I want is things back the way they were.
How do I ever consider another lover,
When there is no one who will ever measure up to you,
How could you leave me like this!
How do I ever trust anyone ever again,
You promised you wouldn't break my heart or Jette's,
But you did.
You promised me a wedding in Mozambique,
You at my side,
Sand in my feet.
You promised me a future,
A future in which I was your wife,
Now I live this lonely life.
I believed in happily ever after,
I believed in it with you,
And now I am just this lonely woman, lost without you.
Forced to walk into rooms and feel inadequate and small,
When with you,
I walked tall!
I don't know how,
I don't know why,
And I am angry with the earth, sea and sky!
